"perceiving life as a perpetual film."

hannah - miss pampered princess piggy

i'm clacking away on the keyboard in the basement of angie's home in murrysville, pennsylvania at the moment, just 30 minutes away from pittsburgh. my hair's still wet and i've got tons to say, can't believe i'm on the 3rd last leg of my enormous summer vacation here in the States. after this i'm heading to norman's place in fairfax, virginia, then to mil's in dallas, texas, then to hanwei's in houston and back to nyc before flying off to singapore. i got in from new york at 530am this morning in pittsburgh and had a quick breakfast at the mac's where angie works, then crashed on the bed (after a shower) from 945am till 515pm. yeah. i am an absolute pig.

the past few days have shot by in the foggiest of blurs - i can't believe so much has changed in such a short time. left joe in iowa on monday afternoon (i deplore goodbyes, totally detest them tremendously i do) and arrived in newark, int'l airport at 10pm... realizing i should've booked a laguardia flight instead. well, took the amtrak, blearily hailed a nice cabbie (egyptian... perhaps i have a magnet for them) and wended my way to jinny and alex's place in astoria, queens. forgot to tell jinny and joe my singaporean number so both of them were kinda worried about me and jinny was shouting from the third floor window... whoops. wrong time to decide to save on the phone bill i guess.

yeah so. monday to thursday marked my fourth time in nyc this year - which is more than most people will be able to say for a lifetime, i guess. tuesday jinny had to go and give english tuition (haha yeah!) and so i had to bustle around and get ready within 20 minutes to go out, and this time i just went onto the metro without checking the train, and got off wherever i wanted. and i got off on 42nd, and walked round' the block, and there's bryant park in the blastingly hot dappled sunshine, and i'm alone. the world never seemed so big as this. where people cannot pinpoint your exact location on the globe, where noone can view the colored reels that wind seamlessly, relentlessly forward inside your brain.

so i get caught up in the new york public library again - only this time there's an exhibition on how the status of the victorian female has changed over time - emancipation through a few goodly womens' works. the next day jinny and i meet kelly, joe's cousin for lunch somewhere near ground zero (the gaping void directly next to the crass capitalistic century21 store).. jinny and i then queue up for half-price tickets to watch the producers (middle of first row on mezzanine floor, 54.25 USD per ticket) and jinny cooks dinner for us all while we get ready, dresses and shawls, makeup and all.

the producers was a great show. i laughed and understood probably half to two-thirds of the references to past broadway shows and classic films, and during intermission sat alone under the dim lights feeling very much alone and wondering if my enjoyment was marred by that particular heartache... jinny having alex and me having noone but the old man by my side that enthusiastically stood up for a solitary encore along our side of the row at the end of the musical. ah well. i think too much. after the show we had coldstonecreamery's cheesecake dream.... frozen blueberries and all. always serves to lift my mood, icecream does. i weighed myself today. totally put on 10 pounds since i've arrived here in the states and i'm lazily doing nowt to take it all off. tomorrow, tomorrow. bah.

okay. it's late and i'm suffering heartache. you know why. take cares, and write me. be safe.