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Saturday, February 07, 2009
i haven't talked in a long time. sometimes i think i've lost track of who i am.
the past is so easy to forget, the present so easy to lose oneself in. like someone said to me, it doesn't feel like a new year, with new beginnings and new thoughts and new aspirations, just merely a seamless gray (i prefer the US spelling here) segueing from one day to the next. who visits here anymore? who wants to find out more about me? my mind's a bit jumbled up at the present. i don't like the direction of my life and feel i could possibly do more with it, only that i don't know what i really love or what i'm good at. even words desert me, slip out of my fingers and run away, my sentences chunky like the rest of me right now. i ran in tight jeans, 90 percent of the way home until the pathway stopped and it was all grass and wire fence my youngest brother doesn't like reading at all. i try to push him, bought everything from possibly forbidden stuff (pullman) by nearing-puritanical parents to the thinnest books and so far maybe he's only read captain underpants from cover to cover. not even children's books by gaiman did the trick. perhaps he's just not interested in imagining unreality, unlike me who took to reading like clockwork. this could possibly tell you more about me. or maybe not. you are probably sleeping somewhere out there on the island tonight, or not, burdened by me and my stubborn needs. while i walked out there in the wilderness, hot and sweaty and full of paranoid imaginings. i am sorry i am like this. juice.susceptible had time to talk trash at 12:44 AM
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august 2014. how time flies! i still feel like i have so much more growing up to do. :)
funny how life changes forever with the most miniscule of happenings. the startled meeting of two surreptitious glances in the mirror, the sudden dangled offering of purchase of free flight. the thin results slip, the inconspicuous admissions letter. the bad phone call, a moment's folly of taking advantage of someone. the last thoughtless caustic remark that pushes a strained friendship over the edge. i love/hate life. and i know it's a loan. archiveblog.
newblog. created for EN 3249: The Body - Politics, Poetics and Perception
modern daguerrotypography.
People.
here are the results of my aimless wanderings throughout endless cyberspace. limited in scope but thoroughly interesting, i guarantee.
books this season.
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new chatbox! wow, what an improvement.