I’m back after being detached from so-called ‘civilisation’, cut off from news, connections or communications of any kind. I guess when you stay in a place where the most basic needs are the only things you worry about, like food and shelter, news like Saddam Hussein’s capture isn’t really so much of an important thing. I’m going off on a philosophical, rambling tangent here, so I hope whoever’s reading this doesn’t find me too preachy. Everything comes from the heart.

Going to a place like Cha-fang, an orphanage in northern thailand is something that every bcyouth ought to experience. The morning and night mists from warm food and warm exhalations, the red and white vibrant poinsettias lining the pathways of the village and up towards the church, the blackest night sky that is so filled with zillions of stars the constellations are visible until the pale orange full moon arises with its aura of soft light, the sense of the butt being one with the muddy floor of the pickup truck on bumpy roads for hours are all but side dishes to this week that's felt more like a month. The kids touched our hearts, they were so pure, it didn’t matter they were so dirty on the outside, I’m sure God knows their hearts were rich with love. Everything they had they shared, they woke up early to praise God from 6.30 am in the morning with songs that woke the whole village. Somehow one comes away realising that the verse which says that it is easier for a camel to enter the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven is so right, the poor of the earth are indeed blessed. We here who enjoy simple luxuries like clean, filtered, HOT water to bathe with take these things so much for granted. The doctors who were in our team found out the kids were suffering from scabies and head lice (along with a whole host of ailments that comes from no proper diets, no hygiene habits), but these are not surprising when the water to bathe with is already mud-tainted and is freezingly cold. I can only hope I don’t forget this experience too soon, and that everyone who’s been through this will continue to uphold chafang in prayer. That day of farewell was pretty hard on the kids.

it’s a total shell-shock to return here and suddenly be bombarded with stuff to do, with news of FMPS’s principal’s death by drowning and with SLR around the corner, not to mention finding out my dad underwent surgery last week and has now got 60 days of MC.. darn I shoulda learnt to drive earlier… haha. To tell the truth I haven’t missed anything more than the theme of ‘CLEAN’.. everyone who stepped into Gate 21 last night of Changi Airport sorta had an orangey tinge to them. anyway. Life and time moves on, at least until Judgement Day arrives which I know I’m not quite exactly prepared for. Christmas is here, and buying gifts is hard when the ‘Baht effect’ and the feeling of utter unfairness enters my mind each time I sit here at the computer or at the television or on my bed which is three times as thick as the mattresses they specially bought for us to sleep on. (the kids sleep on thin wooden boards on their bunk beds, with only blankets to shield them from the cold so prevalent at this time of the year).

I just hope we think twice before spending, eating or just about doing anything, although it’s so easy to let the selfish mentality take over and let ourselves be caught up in our own trivial matters, be they academic, financial or relational problems. We are so SO blessed, and ought to be grateful for it.

oh yeah. and try to stop looking so much into the mirror. they didn't have mirrors there at all, and not having to look at myself for 8 days was so refreshingly wonderful i urge all to try it. haha. it's great to shed some of the singaporean self-conscious mentality. go think about it.